Celebrating Growth

“The bamboo that bends is stronger than the oak that resists.” ~ Japanese Proverb

As this year comes to a close, life has a way of holding up a mirror. Some of us find ourselves in a slight state of impatience and anticipation, ready for the chance to leave it all behind. Others have been doing the assessments and reconciliations throughout the year, making sure to navigate back to center when energy, motivation, emotions, and external situations, both in and out of our control, threaten to keep us off course.

My daily work to stay balanced begins with my morning rituals. One aspect of that is listening to audiobooks on mind mastery or inspirational talks. On the days I need a steady anchor and a sense of grounding, these messages offer a reminder of what I already know, reflected through a different perspective. It is rarely new information, yet it always arrives on time, meeting me where I am and encouraging me to stay the course in whatever I am moving through.

Recently, a video entitled “Trust Life’s Timing” came across my feed, and what started out in the background soon caught my full attention. It spoke about the growth process and accepting all aspects of it. As with many things, this was unexpected but right on time. The video highlighted many stoic concepts such as “the obstacle is the way,” reminding us that every obstacle is a teacher and that when we suffer loss, it can show us what truly matters.

As I continued to listen, many things resurfaced and I once again asked myself: Is there ever a point where I will just coast? Will there be a time when all my karmic debts are settled and all my dues paid? Will there be an end to the deep-rooted patterns that resurface in the very moments I thought I finally had it all together? What is the point of it all?

This year has been full of delays and setbacks, and they are often necessary to redirect us when we are off path or beginning to drift in the wrong direction. Sometimes it is a gentle nudge, sometimes a firm tap, and sometimes we fall flat in an unceremonious way. It is simply a detour. What happens after a setback is key. We can choose to be upset and see it as punishment and shame ourselves, or we can choose to see it for what it is: a better way to move, a better way to grow. After a setback or redirect, compassion for self is key so that we do not build up resistance and potentially miss the beauty and the blessing.

From the Stoic perspective, the obstacle is the way, and every obstacle teaches us that there is a better path. I find that when I am resistant to delays or setbacks, I unconsciously create an obstacle through my lack of surrender to what is. From that compassion at the end of a setback comes the work of “innerstanding” how resistance shows up, in what forms, and what the triggers for resistance are. Why do events with similar intensity happen and, in some cases, we are fine and can move through them, while with others we are kicking and screaming, cursing our luck? When we understand when and how resistance comes up, we can begin to loosen our hold on it.

There will always be challenging conditions, but if we understand that challenges can condition our minds and nervous systems to welcome great peace, joy, and happiness, we become more open to them. Not anxiously anticipating, but willing to learn. For me, there are images I return to for comfort and inspiration: the coal under pressure revealing the jewel, the lotus growing through dark, heavy, muddy conditions to open petal by petal, running a race and wanting to give up as the body shuts down, yet somehow a powerful second wind rises from deep within and moves you to the finish line.

Life is a divinely inspired cycle, and as long as we have the blessing of being in the body on this earth, there will be something to navigate. But can we, no matter what is present, what is coming up, or what may come up, celebrate it? The feel goods, the not-so-feel goods, the highs, the lows? Can we celebrate life as it unfolds and be an active participant, like a captain who steers the boat but does not own or control the sea?

I believe we can. It takes willingness and patience. Will you celebrate with me?

With love and gratitude,
Dana Andrea

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