One Step at a Time

“That which is real never changes, and that which changes is not real.” ~ Bhagavad Gita

After nearly six months of navigating life with the use of one foot, I am so happy to be back on my feet—literally. The doctor did one last x-ray and finally cleared me to start walking again without the assistance of the knee scooter or crutches. It was also fine to walk without the boot, though he mentioned that it may take time to feel comfortable without it.

While I knew physical therapy would be necessary to address some of the imbalances from all the time spent operating out of balance, somewhere in my mind I thought that—as a yogi and someone with good body awareness—getting back to walking would be simple.

Pain and tenderness were expected—I did have surgery—but I assumed my body would soon remember and reset itself.

Well, that was a lie—or rather, a huge delusion on my part. I waited until I was back in the safety of my home to test things out. Excited, I took off the boot, found an area with a hard surface to walk on and plenty of counters for support, and began my journey back to life on two feet. I started mentally planning where I was going to store all the items that had been essential for my healing and mobility. While they were helpful, I wanted them out of sight and out of mind.

As to be expected, the first steps were painful and scary. I felt like a baby fawn trying to get its footing. I channeled my inner coach and coaxed myself to keep walking slowly and carefully. I stayed on a clear path and avoided the steps. I continued to breathe and move slowly, and instead of the pain going away, it got worse. My legs were shaky, and without the help of various items that were lending support, I wouldn’t have been able to move steadily.

The discomfort sat me down again, and I soon found myself resting with my foot propped high. But I was too grateful to be at this stage of healing to feel sad about not being able to walk right away. I accepted that I wasn’t going to jump back in from where I left off. I used this time to research what signs to look out for that might indicate that there was a problem, and I narrowed down my search to find a physical therapist who specializes in foot injuries. I released all fear and affirmed that all is well.

My healing is happening, and it’s still taking time. During this time, I will find my center again and accept that how I moved before is not how I can move now. I will remain open to changing even the simplest ways I move my body. I cultivate deep patience and continue to be kind and gentle with my foot—not forcing it to fully support me before it’s ready.

True healing often asks us to navigate change that we couldn’t have expected.

This healing is different. In the past, I would do all the things I knew—talk to healers, seek answers, do whatever I could to speed up the process. But this time, it’s different—and that’s okay.

In yoga, there’s a principle called svadhyaya, or self-study. It’s the practice of paying attention to ourselves—our thoughts, our triggers, especially the ones that don’t support us—in service of our own growth.

So this month’s theme at the studio, Centered in Change, is one that I’m embracing fully.

Because whether I’m walking across a room, guiding others in practice, or simply sitting still, the work is the same: to return to myself again and again, and meet this moment as it is—with presence, with breath, and with love.

With love and gratitude,
Dana Andrea